Getting more and more involved

Mr Tan began volunteering at Kong Hwa School in 1999 when his eldest child enrolled at the school. That was the same year the VSP was formed. Mr Tan became a member of the editorial committee and was involved in "interviewing teachers, writing about topical issues, and helping in editorial work".

Mr Tan (right) is now chairman of the parent support group at Kong Hwa School.

After a year of active contributions to the VSP, Mr Tan stepped down to help out with the Chinese Orchestra instead. His eldest son had joined the Orchestra and to show their support, Mr Tan and his wife were seen assisting with the logistics or giving encouragement to the members at performances or competitions. Their involvement continued when their second child also became a member of the Orchestra.

In 2004, to Mr Tan's surprise, he was asked to lead the VSP. He went on to initiate many activities and the VSP even hosted the first cluster-based convention for parent support groups in 2005. Although he stepped down to once more focus on helping the Chinese Orchestra, last year the principal invited him to chair the VSP again.

Parenthood is like driving

What motivated Mr Tan to become a parent volunteer? "Our children spend a lot of time in school and they enjoy school," he begins. "So I started asking myself what it would be like if I could also spend some of my time in their school. I was curious about how the school functions, what makes it tick, and I was also interested to meet other parents. You could say it was really curiosity that led me onto the path of being a parent volunteer."

His children seem pleased with his involvement. His second child Gale says, "I'm happy as he is aware of what is happening in school and always actively participating in many school events." Her younger brother Keif, a Pri 6 pupil, enthuses, "I'm always the first one to know what activities are coming up. I also get to go on interesting trips such as to Malaysia and get to know more people."

Mr Tan (right) and fellow parent volunteers learning to make mooncakes, in preparation for a school activity to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival.

After many years of volunteering, Mr Tan concludes, "There's really nothing better than being a parent volunteer in the school where your children are studying." Not only does it keep him in touch with what's going on in school and allow him to know the teachers better, it's also helped him to bond with his children and develop close friendships with other parents.

Mr Tan believes one of a parent's main roles is to "support their children's growth and development". He shares this interesting analogy on parenthood: "It's like driving - in the beginning, we take the driver's seat and the children are all passengers. Along the way, we tell them about the places that we pass by, talk about road signs and safety. As they get older, we tell them more about navigation and destinations."

Interestingly, he adds that parents must learn to let go as their children will eventually become the drivers and choose their own routes and destinations. "I encourage parents to prepare to 'alight' earlier and start taking a stroll together to smell the roses while we still can. The painful truth is that our children will not always be beside us. So we should not take our spouses for granted," he opines.

For now, though, Mr Tan relishes his role as a "driver", to support his children in discovering and developing their strengths and talents.